Stylish But Sedate
Avengers Has No Substance

Warner Bros. evidently suspected that their recipe for the remake of the 1960s British spy show "The Avengers" would leave a bad taste in everyone's mouth. The studio, in an effort to subvert early bad reviews, refused to screen the film in advance for reviewers (although this didn't affect yours truly). They were right to worry.

While The Avengers does include a certain amount of style, from the British style of dress to the wonderful settings, it is completely void of substance. Unlike a James Bond film, this movie lacks any real flair for the big screen. Not even some interesting special effects can save it from terminal boredom. I had high hopes for this movie and was extremely disappointed.

In this incarnation of The Avengers, Oscar-nominee Ralph Fiennes (Schindler's List and The English Patient) plays British secret agent John Steed. Steed is called in by his superiors at the Ministry to investigate a shut down of a special defense grid known as Prospero. To assist him, the Ministry has enlisted the help of Emma Peel (Uma Thurman) one of the former heads of the Prospero Project. Ironically, Mrs. Peel is also the chief suspect since her image is caught on a security camera when Prospero failed.

There are a number of moments worth seeing in the movie, such as Steed and Peel's fencing duel or the chess match in her house. And although much of the dry, British wit may go over the heads of American audiences, it was true to form and delightful. Even the use of obligatory spy gadgets was done with subtlety and taste. Unfortunately, such moments were few and far between. The only nod to the original series was the use of Patrick Macnee (television's John Steed) as the voice of the archive researcher, Invisible Jones.

While the style and look of the British cult classic may have been adopted, the story itself is so predictable and sedate that it becomes tiresome. When the story attempts something different, it either errs to the side of caution or becomes so outlandish as to seem silly. I only have to mention a scene with people in teddy bear costumes around a board table to warn you how ridiculous the movie becomes.

Perhaps the greatest tragedy in The Avengers is the fact that veteran actor Sean Connery is wasted. As Sir August de Wynter, a former Ministry member, Connery brings something diabolical to the screen. Unfortunately, even his big scenes are subject to uninspired direction and cinematography. When he makes his ultimatum to the world, for instance, his "Now is the winter of your discontent..." speech begins on a television in the Ministry's headquarters. It makes de Wynter seem small and insignificant, and hardly a threat to anyone.

As I watched The Avengers, something else occurred to me. There were no people in the many outdoor shots of London and England's countryside. It appeared that -- in an effort to lower the budget -- Warner Bros. decided that extras were unnecessary to the story and therefore eliminated. The result shows London as completely lifeless, save Steed and Mrs. Peel. The effect makes the whole picture seem like a low-budget television movie. Which, perhaps, is what it should have been.

MY RATING: 2 out of 10.

RATED: PG-13
RUN TIME: 91 min.