Last X-Man Standing
Last Stand Ends With a Whimper

Mission: Impossible III fizzled. Poseidon sank. The Da Vinci Code was broken. After a disappointing start to summer, I expected things to turn around when the mutant heroes arrived. I am a comic book geek and enjoy just about any comic book movie. Nevertheless, I had trouble with the latest installment of the X-Men franchise. Problems with story, characters, and motivation, make X-Men: The Last Stand a failed finale.

X-Men: The Last Stand
Storm (Halle Berry) mentors two of the younger X-Men in the final installment of the X-Men trilogy. (20th Century Fox, 2006)
Directed by: Brett Ratner
Written by: Simon Kinberg and Zak Penn
Starring: Patrick Stewart, Hugh Jackman, Halle Berry, Ian McKellen, Famke Janssen, Anna Paquin, and Kelsey Grammer

Rated PG-13 (for intense sequences of action violence, some sexual content and language)
Running time: 104 min.

FilmGuru's Rating : 3 out of 10.

At the end of the last movie, Jean Grey (Famke Janssen) sacrificed herself to get the X-Men to safety. While the X-Men are still reeling over her death, her lover Scott (James Marsden) has lost all hope. He no longer cares about the school, the X-Men, or their mission. Returning to Alkali Lake (the place of her death), he finds her alive. Her miraculous return, however, bodes a dangerous turn of events.

When a pharmaceutical company creates a serum that can suppress the mutant gene, the mutant community goes on alert. Half of those with abilities that make them different, want a chance to be normal. The other half believe they are the way nature intended and have no need of a "cure."

As expected, the mutant terrorist Magneto (Ian McKellen) uses this so-called cure as a rallying cry for mutants. He fears that the cure will not be voluntary for long and that his kind will soon be forced by governments to surrender their powers. When a weapon is found that fires darts filled with the cure, Magneto's fears become justified.

The other camp, led by Charles Xavier (Patrick Stewart) adopts a wait-and-see attitude, with hopes that mutants and humans can work together from inside the system. Hank McCoy (Kelsey Grammer), the Beast, is a former student of Xavier's and now works as the Secretary of Mutant Affairs. It is his connections to power, particularly the President, that gives hope to peace-loving mutants.

The X-Men movies have never been in line with the comic books, something that has always bothered me to some degree. I was not happy to see the X-Men roster so disjointed from forty years of continuity. I don't like seeing super heroes clad in black leather. I hate changes in characters -- for example, Juggernaut (Vinnie Jones) should not be a mutant. And I don't like changes in storylines.

The X-Men story of Jean Grey's death and resurrection as Phoenix (and her transformation into Dark Phoenix) is one of the holy scriptures of X-Men comics. Spanning over three years, it includes the introduction of an entity known as the Phoenix force, involves subtle manipulation of Jean's personality, and ends in a heart-breaking tragedy of self-sacrifice. This film had none of those things.

The film wastes so much. After a brief cameo in the second X-Men film, Colossus (Daniel Cudmore) is offered no back story. He remains a two-dimensional strong man. The Sentinels -- giant, mutant-hunting robots and a mainstay of X-Men lore for over 20 years -- are given a throwaway cameo in a Danger Room sequence. No effort is made to give the horde of Magneto followers any penache; they look like tattooed homeless people, not mutants. Most heartbreaking, the Phoenix force (a fiery bird-like aura that surrounds Jean in her Phoenix persona) is never used in the film.

The film smacks of low-budget crap. Yes, the special effects were nice, but they were wasted. What's the point of spending who knows how much on a sequence of Magneto lifting the Golden Gate Bridge over the bay, if he's only going to lob cars at the military? Where are the money shots? I expect some close-ups of heroes doing heroic things. I don't want to just see Wolverine and Beast bouncing off people. I want to see X-Men using their powers in amazing ways.

Where is the sense of wonder? I want to see Colossus change into his armored form. I want to see more students using their mutant powers at the school. I need to have more than a passing glimpse of Raven Darkholm dealing with her "cure." What is the reaction to the cure among the mutant community at large? It seems as if all the mutants in the world either go to Xavier's school or enlisted in Magneto's army.

More importantly, who made the decision that this monumental conflict should include only six X-Men? Sending six heroes to stop Magneto's army is beyond stupid. The X-Men comics are filled with mutants wearing the X-badge. If ever there was a time for all good mutants to come to the aid of their cause, this is it. It should have been an ultimate showdown, the war to end all wars. For a "last stand" the confrontation seems horribly tame.

Writers Simon Kinberg and Zak Penn and director Brett Ratner show a complete ignorance of the motivation behind these characters. In a world where mutants are treated as second-class citizens, the ethics of a cause become paramount. To utilize the "cure" in an effort to bring down a villain is not a viable solution. The ends do not justify the means. Heroes must stand up for ethics above all else. They must not kill and they must never take the easy way out. Ironically, Xavier is teaching an ethics class during the film. Apparently, Kinberg and Penn didn't understand what he was talking about.

Ratner's pacing of the film is all over the place. When the story should be centered on a brewing war, he shifts to an unnecessary teenage love triangle. Characters walk out of the story and don't return until the end. And then there are the deaths. A lot has been made among fans regarding the rumored deaths in the film. Let me just say this. Of all the deaths on and off-screen, not a one touched me. Each felt cheap, unnecessary, and inappropriate. It was as if 20th Century Fox was deliberately trying to bury the franchise.

For the record, there were some nice moments in the film. Hearing the Beast use his classic exclamation "Oh, my stars and garters!" was a delightful surprise. Seeing Iceman finally suit up in ice form was spectacular (however, brief and last minute). Unfortunately, these were two shining moments in an otherwise underwhelming film.

Upon leaving the screening of X-Men: The Last Stand, I was both sad and frustrated. So much potential had been wasted. A film that could have capped a great series became nothing more than another bad sequel. If Marvel had as much concern for its flagship properties as DC, this film would not have been made. Yes, I will probably own it when it comes out on DVD, but only to watch as part of the set. It's a tragic end to a good trilogy.